.Have you ever wondered what’s a love language? And if there is more than one? You might have your own particular way of expressing love without even being aware of it. In general, there are 5 love languages through which people express and receive love in a relationship.
Everyone has their own definition of love and how to express it. Your love language might not be the same as your partner’s and that’s okay.
If you know your partner’s love language and they know yours, there is a great chance that both of you will feel loved and appreciated in the relationship.
Couples spent ages trying to figure out how to make their special ones feel loved. You might go out of your way to express love to your partner with grand gestures or gifts. But if this isn’t their love language, they will end up feeling disappointed.
Let’s find out what are the 5 love languages and how to use them to convey love to your partner.
What are the five love languages in relationships?
The five love languages were first introduced by Dr. Gary Chapman, a marriage counselor, in his book The 5 Love Languages. These love languages are not just used romantically, but also platonically.
1. Love language: Words of Affirmation
The first love language on the list is “Words of Affirmation”. Words of affirmation are sentences that express how you feel about your partner or a loved one.
People who prefer this as their love language feel loved and appreciated through words alone. For instance, if your partner’s love language is words of affirmation and yours isn’t, you will be surprised if they ask you whether you care about them.
From your perspective, you might feel you have been doing everything possible to show them that you love them. And just the fact that you are in a relationship with them is a sign enough that you love and care about them.
However, your partner needs to be told verbally how much you love them and want them in your life. People who prefer words of affirmation feel secure and loved when you express whatever you feel in words.
If you have trouble expressing them out loud, you can say it through a note or text. What matters is they receive it through words.
2. Love language: Quality Time
People who prefer quality time as their love language want your undivided attention. They feel most loved and appreciated when you choose to spend your time with them.
A partner that loves quality time will want the focus and attention to be on them for the time that you are with them. This means putting the phone down or turning off the T.V and listening actively to what they are saying. They always prefer a lot of eye contact while communicating.
What they need to feel loved and chosen by their partner is the latter’s full presence. For instance, they might be happy when you buy them gifts or write them a sweet letter. But if you are constantly busy and can’t make time to meet them, they are probably going to feel neglected.
Nothing makes them happier than you making the time out of your busy schedule and taking them out for dinner or a stroll by the park even if it is just for 30 minutes.
3. Love language: Acts of Service
If you love it when your partner does nice things for you, then your love language is an act of service. Things like helping around the house, doing tasks for you that you have been putting off, throwing out the garbage, or filling up the gas tank in your car.
These are some of the things that fall under acts of service that you can perform to make your partner feel loved. The most loving thing you could do for them is to do their chores for them or take burdens off their shoulders. Checking off their to-do list with or without them would probably make their day.
Because for people who prefer acts of service, a chore is never a chore. Helping them with a task or even grocery shopping with them is a sign that you care about them.
This also means that they might feel unappreciated and hurtful if you don’t share their load. If their love language is an act of service, then making the bed or doing the laundry will put you further along in the relationship than just telling them ‘I love you’ every day.
4. Love language: Gift Giving
At first glance, gift giving may seem a bit materialistic. But the truth is far from it. If your partner’s love language or yours is receiving gifts then it is probably the easiest way to feel loved and admired.
Gifts are the visual symbols of love. It’s important to remember that gift-giving as a love language has nothing to do with how expensive or classy the gift is.
The price tag isn’t what matters here. It is the thought behind the gift that you give is what matters.
Those that prefer gift giving as their love language see the gift as a sign of how much their partner loves them. The amount of time you spent thinking about the gift and what would make them happy is what’s on their mind when they receive the gift.
Sometimes you don’t need to purchase a gift at all. A handmade gift or a photo album of your best memories together are some of the few things that will make them feel incredibly cherished.
5. Love language: Physical Touch
Physical touch is a bit of an obvious type of love language. Because there’s always a certain amount of it in every relationship. But if this is the love language of your partner then it is a crucial way that they feel connected to you.
If you are not quick to give hugs or kisses then there is a chance your partner may feel neglected or unloved. As this is their love language, every physical gesture toward them translates your love for them,
This doesn’t mean that you break out the PDA or anything extravagant. A simple hand holding or an arm around their waist will make their heart soar. It tells them that they are important to you and you are not afraid of showing it.
Bottom Line
When two people start dating it can be a bit tough to figure out what their love language is. But when you truly care about someone and are willing to go the extra mile for them these 5 love languages can be your Cupid’s arrow.
Or, arrows.
